Friday in the Nineteenth Week of Ordinary Time, August 18, 2023

Matthew 19, 3-12

Some Pharisees approached Jesus, and tested him, saying, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any cause whatever?” He said in reply, “Have you not read that from the beginning the Creator made them male and female and said, For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh? So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore, what God has joined together, man must not separate.” They said to him, “Then why did Moses command that the man give the woman a bill of divorce and dismiss her?” He said to them, “Because of the hardness of your hearts Moses allowed you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so. I say to you, whoever divorces his wife (unless the marriage is unlawful) and marries another commits adultery.” His disciples said to him, “If that is the case of a man with his wife, it is better not to marry.” He answered, “Not all can accept this word, but only those to whom that is granted. Some are incapable of marriage because they were born so; some, because they were made so by others; some, because they have renounced marriage for the sake of the Kingdom of heaven. Whoever can accept this ought to accept it.”

The Pharisees, like members of other self-assured political and religious movements, did not ask questions in order to learn something new, as we saw St. Peter doing in yesterday’s reading.  They only asked questions for ulterior purposes.  In asking their question about marriage in today’s reading, they seek to pin Jesus into revealing what movement he belonged to, but their primary objective is to trap him in advocating for a teaching contrary to their view on the Mosaic Law: St. Matthew says that they “tested him”.  The Greek word may also be translated as “they tempted him”, as in, they tempted him to espouse an extreme view which would lose him his followers.

“Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any cause whatever?”  If the law of Moses is read strictly, the answer is no, not for just “any cause”.  The following passage is the most quoted as indicative of the attitude of Moses regarding divorce: “When a man takes a wife and marries her, if then she finds no favor in his eyes because he has found some indecency in her, and he writes her a bill of divorce and puts it in her hand and sends her out of his house . . .” (Deuteronomy 24, 1).  The passage as a whole prohibits the man who has divorced his wife from remarrying her if she is divorced from a subsequent husband, but the quoted words shows that divorce existed among the Israelites before God gave the law to them through Moses, and that it is permitted only when “some indecency” is found in her.  The meaning of these words is disputed, but what is clear is that some very grave reason must exist for such an action to be taken.  The woman is permitted to marry again (for her own survival), and the man too (for the sake of begetting children, which would ensure his survival in old age).  It was permitted, then, but we see the divine will here when the Lord God spoke thus through the Prophet Malachi: “The Lord was witness to the covenant between you and the wife of your youth . . . she is your companion and your wife by covenant . . . so take heed to yourselves, and let none be faithless to the wife of his youth. For I hate divorce, says the Lord the God of Israel” (Malachi 2, 14-16).  

At the time of Jesus, two scholarly opinions conflicted on the matter.  The most recent one, held by the Jewish teacher Hillel, allowed for greater flexibility in causes for divorce, while the traditional teaching held otherwise.  The Pharisees are interested in forcing the Lord Jesus into revealing his sympathies for or against Hillel.  The Lord, however, goes to the very heart of the matter: “What God has joined together, man must not separate.”  That is, the unity in marriage is the work of God, not of human beings.  It can never be the work of human beings because it is a unity.  Unity differs from every other kind of relationship because it exists on the level of being.  All other relationships exist on the level of proximity, common interests, (mere) physical attraction, business, or some other passing thing, and can be readily dissolved if they become no longer necessary or convenient.  This reality is illustrated when the Lord says, “Therefore, what God has joined together, man must not separate.”  Death alone can dissolve this unity.  The disciples reacted strongly to this, to the point of hyperbole: “If that is the case of a man with his wife, it is better not to marry.”  We see here how the teachings of Hillel had filtered into the communities from which the Lord’s disciples came.  But the Lord does not actually answer this complaint.  He has spoken and he will not back down from his teaching nor provide further elaboration.  

He does, however, teach regarding a related topic.  He prefaces this topic by saying, “Not all can accept this word, but only those to whom that is granted.”  This makes it clear that he has turned from the subject of marriage and divorce to a subject regarding which there is some subjectivity.  He then proceeds: “Some are incapable of marriage because they were born so; some, because they were made so by others; some, because they have renounced marriage for the sake of the Kingdom of heaven.”  That is, not all people are called to marriage.  According to the Mosaic Law, a man who could not procreate because of a physical impediment (castration, for instance) “shall not enter the assembly of the Lord” (Deuteronomy 23, 1), and so could not marry.  And then there are those who have “renounced marriage” for the kingdom of heaven.  At that time, the Lord could have pointed to John the Baptist and also himself as prime exemplars of this.  Later, St. Paul will advocate for celibacy among the early Christians as allowing them to most fully prepare for the second coming 1 Corinthians 7, 7).  The Lord, having presented this teaching, then reiterates, “Whoever can accept this ought to accept it.”  That is, the one who is called to celibacy for the sake of the kingdom of heaven ought to be celibate.  By linking the teaching on marriage with that of celibacy, the Lord shows that there are two life-callings for his disciples, that both have divine origins, and that both have the kingdom for their ends, as he himself has approved them. 

It is worth noting that on two occasions we see the Lord’s disciples complain strongly about his teachings: first, here, regarding marriage, and, second, regarding the doctrine of his Body and Blood (John 6, 60).  Marriage is the uniting (for Catholics, the sacred bonding) of a man and woman.  The Holy Eucharist unites us more closely with the Lord Jesus in his Body to which we were joined in our Baptism.  Our wounded human nature continually drives us towards disunity and the fantasy of autonomy.  The Lord offers us these two doctrines as curative and directive so that we might enter heaven and perfect unity with him there.